The Mean Little Kitty Song

And no, it’s not about me.

Back back backity back

So I’ve not really been busy – can’t say that – but I’ve just not had a whole lot to write about. I promise I won’t make a habit of it, but here’s a bullet list of the goings-ons of Kitty:

• Zilla and I got Nintendo DS’s. And damn, I’m totally addicted to Zelda. And, did you know that you can draw on a DS and then send it to someone else with a DS? First picture that got exchanged? A Kitty original of Gouty getting my cat off in a dirty sexual manner.
• Speaking of Gouty, he’s got a new blog – and he wrote about getting the cat off, me catching him pooping, and other fun things!
• And speaking of Zilla, which I so often do and never get tired of, I’m meeting his Momma and Stepfather this Sunday. And while I’m not one to ever really get nervous, I’m terrified. I really want to make a good impression, and I’m so afraid I’ll do something wrong. I’m too rough around the edges for parental meetings.
• And speaking of parents again, I’ve been composing and re-composing this long letter to my Dad and Mom about me being gay and all the good stuff that goes with it. I’ve never really hid anything from them, but I’ve never really thrown it all out there either, and I’m just too old and too bold to beat around the bush.
• Had a LOVELY dinner with Yellow Fever, Teach and Gouty. Very fun, and a shame it happens infrequently.
• Zilla and I start Japanese on Saturday – I can’t wait to learn another language. Maybe I’ll remember this one.
• I’ve been craving caramel like it’s going out of style. Not sure why.
• Blood pressure problems suck. Finding the right drug for my patented brand of evil has been such a struggle, and I’m so sick of feeling miserable.
• Zilla’s birthday came early. And seeing his face … one of my favorite moments.
• We also built cute Halloween Build-a-Bear Cats for each other. Mine’s name is Ezmerelda – she barks and meows, and according to Zilla, has an identity crisis.
• Tater, Zilla, Crazy/Hot and I are going to the Forest Park Balloon Race this weekend. Can’t wait. Friday night, Zilla, Professor McHottie and her partner are going to get drinks and have sushi.
• I miss Bizkit and Tea so bad sometimes that it physically hurts. It kills me to to think of how physically far away they are.
• My intern is a rock star. My boss is amazing.
• And fucking Noodles, my cat, even though he’s adorable, was apparently craving chocolate mint and he ate my chocolate mint plant that my co-worker propagated for me. Bummer.

Four

Today is four months for me and Zilla.

I took him cupcakes last night – cuz he’s my cupcake and all.

I love that every time I think of him, I still smile from ear to ear. And that I still think he’s the hottest guy I’ve ever seen every time I look at him. And that just the thought of him brightens my day and makes me happy.

And he loves it when I buy him silly toys.

And  I love it when I talk in that annoying screechy voice that drives him crazy and it still makes him laugh.

And that he hearts champagne as much as I do.

And that he has the most amazing, beautiful eyes that I’ve ever seen.

And that he used to throw tennis balls at cars when he got pissed off in traffic.

And that I can tell he’s excited to see me whenever he sees me, regardless of how dumpy I look (I’m rarely dumpy looking, but he is excited to see me even when I am. C’mon, I’m a fox, ya’ll!).

And that we love watching scary movies together – and he never gets scared, and I always do.

And that he loves Disney movies, and Care Bears movies.

And makes religious jokes just like I do, no matter how poor taste they may be.

And that he makes stuffed animals talk.

And that my cats love him – more than me.

And that my friends love him, and he is crazy about them.

And that he’s always willing to try new things, no matter how unfamiliar they may be.

And ..

And ….

And …..

And the list can go on and on and on.

I’m thankful, not smug. Blessed, not boasting.

And I’m glad that I finally found the fella that is perfect for me.

I Accidentally A Fleshlight

Okay, I absolutely love harassing customer support for any service – seriously. Calling Charter Communications, for example, is always a precise exercise in the honing of my terrorizing skills.

So while browsing Reddit today, I notice that this very clever fella had decided to harass the Fleshlight company, the maker of sex toys..

Needless to say, he totally PWNED them.

This guy is *relentless.* 

Read the whole thread here – it’s pretty funny, just make sure to read all of them. He’s fantastic.

I tip my hat to you, Mr. Accidentally – job well done.

Chicago Summary

Friday, as seen below, was crunk. We discovered even more delightful vintage clothing places in Wicker Park and also an awesome diner – The Blueline – that served $3 sangria and jello shots. Friday was indeed crunk.

Saturday more shopping – this time in Lakeview and on Michigan Avenue. Filene’s Basement = perfect.

Sunday – Ann Sather’s – Tater’s first trip there. Also, a trip to the Museum of Science and Industry that included a descent into a coal mine – it was super.

Monday – lunch at Giordano’s, and the sadness that ensued from leaving Biskit and Tea and knowing that I’ll not see them for 2 more months. Also, not snuggling with Zilla for the fifth night in a row.

Relaxed? Yes. Revived? Not so much 😉

Nazi Raccoons? For Real?

I was browsing Reddit this morning, and I saw a headline that said “Nazi Raccoons on the Warpath.”

*blinks eyes*

Seriously?

So of course, I click on it. 

What is below this dotted line is the actual story. From the British rag “The Sun.” Verbatim. Exactly like their website. Oh, and the graphic on this page? Yeah, it’s from the Sun too. Interesting read tho …

—–

Nazi Raccoons on the Warpath

HORDES of Nazi racoons are out to conquer Europe.

They are just across the Channel from Britain after marching through France, Belgium, Holland and Denmark in a furry blitzkrieg.

Hitler aide Hermann Goering had the US mammals introduced to German woods in 1934 to “enrich the Reich’s fauna”.

But numbers have soared and they are invading new territory ? just like the Nazis did. Germany has more than a million racoons.

The 2ft-long creatures have no natural predators and are a serious pest, entering houses to steal food and endangering local wildlife.

Now there are plans to launch a cull. Expert Ulf Hohmann warned: “Racoons will eventually spread to the whole of Europe.”

The menace follows reports of ten million “Stalin” crabs with a 3ft claw span heading towards Britain from Russia.

—-

And there you  have it. BTW, I deplore raccoons – no visit to Europe til after the cull for this Kitty. No way, no how.

Simply the Best

It’s about 11:00 pm, and I’ve been lying in bed for about 10 minutes.

My head is pounding – more than likely because I haven’t taken my allergy medicine for a week now.

I’m sleepless and staring at the ceiling (no Ceiling Cat up there, sadly) and tossing and turning.

I knew that Wednesday would be a busy, intense work day, and that I also had a 3 page paper to write and two learning modules to develop for my classes this semester.

I was dwelling on the laundry that needed to be done in preparation for this weekend’s trip to Chicago for Mary’s 40th birthday, the packing that I’d have to do, and of course, daydreaming about what I’ll do when I when the lottery. (Not “if” but “when.”)

I let this continue til 12:08 am exactly and then decided that I’d had enough.

Hopped in the car, drove the 35 minutes to Zilla‘s crib, walked in the front door and slipped quietly into his warm bed and snuggled up right next to him.

I’d texted on the way, and he’d left the door open and gone back to bed.

I fell asleep instantly – worked like a charm.

This morning, he woke up early, as he always does, and I said, “Thank you for letting me come over last night.”

“Hey,” he smiled. “You can come over any time. I love it when you sleep over. It will never be too late to call me to let me know you’re coming over.”

Then he kissed me on the forehead, like he does every time we wake up next to each other, and left to fix his coffee.

Simply.

The.

Best.

Fear Makes the Wolf Look Bigger

Since I’m obviously on a shameless graffiti-slash-public art kick, I couldn’t resist posting this one either.

Yes, yes it certainly does.

Mind in the Gutter

I was checking out Reddit today and found this really cool blog post about gutter art in Brazil.

Check out the pics. The photo below is just one example of this really cool public art.

I’m a HUGE fan of public art – big, ugly, small, pretty, thought-provoking or frivolous. 

But I really love this stuff. 

We’re Kinda Like Johnny and June

Zilla and I had just finished checking out new movies and video games at Wal-Mart, got in the car, and heard a country singer crooning about how he and his love were like “Johnny and June.”

It was a pretty song, so I said:

“Hey Zilla? We’re kinda like Johnny and June, aren’t we? Cuz we love each other like that much and stuff.”

“Yeah, kind of, except I’m not an alcoholic with anger issues. Not yet,” he said.

“Well, yeah” I said, “I guess there is that.”